SMURF SMURF SMURF


Friday, July 29th, 2011

You know what's awesome? Replacing words from your favorite movies with the word 'Smurf.' 'May the Smurf be with you,' 'Do you feel smurfy, punk?' 'SAY SMURF ONE MORE TIME,'” and 'I am a one man Smurf pack.'”

        You guessed it, Smurfs and Smurfettes - today is the release of SMURFS.  Obviously, the movie is on its way out TODAY.  If you didn't know, Smurfs comics were a lovely French creation, much like baguettes and towers of the Eiffel variety.  They were originally called 'Les Schtroumfs' which sounds like an awesome French independent film.*  They were popular enough, in fact, to be emblazoned upon a five Euro silver piece - made of solid silver.  Works for me - 'Smurf' already sounds like European currency.

        Anyhow, as best I can piece together from Wikipedia, the Smurfs were conceived whilst one guy passed a shaker of salt to another and said 'Schtroumpf' instead of salt.  He said the word a lot more times, and, not unlike Beetlejuice, they popped into existence.

        Or something.

        By now, you should all know the full story - crazy little blue critters are chased by a guy with bad hair and his cat.  There is only one smurf with a beard - he also happens to wear red pants for some reason – I have no idea why.  There was only one female, Smurfette, who is later joined by an evil creation - Sassette, who was created by bad hair dude, but she turned good. They all where white pants with footies, except the females, who wear white dresses and shoes**.  And they live in mushrooms.

        Or something.

        The point is, we totally rocked this movie.  We've all seen the shots, and it's awesome.  In celebration, we have, of course, special treats, many of them BLUE:
        Smurf berries of various types
        Smurffin's
        Smurfurt
        Smurfples***
        Smurf-nola
        Smurflicious things
        Smurfs

        Somewhere, I read that smurfs enjoy, something called smilax regelii. After exhaustive research**** I discovered that it is sasparilla - the primary ingredient in old fashioned Root Beer - so I put a few of those out as well!
ENJOY! You've all earned it! Congratulations on another job well done! Enjoy the treats, everyone!
       
*Probably about the baguettes or some new musical instrument.
**With blatant disregard for the 'no white after labor day' rule
***I’ll be honest - I don't really know what I'm talking about anymore.
****Googled it

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