Bagel of the Lands


Friday, May 25th, 2012

On our planet, there is a country. A country with a very weird name - Uzbekistan.  In Uzbekistan, there is a city.  Beside that city, there is a park.  Next to the park, there is a building. Outside of the building is car.  Inside the car is a hot, hot dashboard. On that dashboard is a melted chocolate bar. Next to the melted chocolate bar is a big book.  Inside the big book, there is an even smaller book hidden Shawshank-style.  Inside of that book is a gum wrapper.  Inside that gum wrapper is probably a stick of gum.  But BESIDE the gum wrapper is a paragraph.  In that paragraph is a sentence - a sentence that answers the question: "What is the meaning of life?"  In that sentence, you will find the following word:

BAGEL.

Anyway, that should clear a few things about existence up for you.

  But I'm not here to talk about how things were. I'm here to talk about how they WILL BE.  Next Friday is NATIONAL DONUT DAY - perhaps the single greatest holiday of all time.  I think it's telling that, given the historical roots of donuts in the military in World War I (see here) .  In any case, this will be a day of Special Magnificence.*  Oh, yes. I have plans.  I encourage everyone to bring your favorite DONUT THEMED TREATS! There will be donuts!  There will be a couple special surprises!  It will be FANTASTIC!

In any case, I look forward to seeing you all there!  Dough'nt miss it.  Ye be warned.

*As Bilbo Baggins once said, it is no bad thing to celebrate a simple donut.  Maybe that's the meaning of life.  If so, it's a good meaning.

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