Everything but the Kitchen Donut


Friday, March 9th, 2012

I've decided to give myself a raise and a promotion.  As I'm the only one in the donut department, I am the head of the donut department - and as head of the donut department, I feel my staff has performed above expectations.  I think I'll be the Executive Managing Director of Donut Operations, which gives me domain over most of the donut related decisions.  Maybe I should be Chief Executive Managing Director of Global Donut Operations just to be sure. Or maybe I should future-proof the job title so I'm the Chief Managing Director of Interplanetary Donut Operations.  Or maybe I'll just bypass all of that, and any necessary political permits or paperwork inherent to interplanetary travel and quarantine laws and simply become Lord of Donuts.  I'll think on it.  Meanwhile, I've definitely earned my 1.5 pastry/month salary increase.

I've brought tasty treats, I've provided variety, I've streamlined the process, and I've negotiated with various vendors to reduce cost, increase quality, and glaze, frost, & sprinkle thoroughly.
Primarily however, I've written emails that have increased donut excitement by 234 happy units /month but leveled donut consumption to 1.25/person.

It's the writing that I'd like to discuss today. We are offering classes here at Digital Domain!  Now that I'm a fancy-pants executive, they've asked that I pass my knowledge along to you. Since I don't actually have any real knowledge, I'm going to teach Creative Writing* instead!

This won't be writing for Social Media, as film professionals are want to do - though I can teach that very quickly:

How to Write for Social Media:
Twitter:                I am eating a #donut
Facebook:       Best donuts ever.  CLike
Foursquare:     This is where I eat donuts
Instagram:      Here's a vintage photo of my donut
YouTube:        Here I am eating a donut
Linkedin:       My skills include donut eating
Pintrest:       Here's a donut recipe
LastFM:         Now I'm listening to "Donuts, Go Nuts!"
Google+:        I'm a Google Employee who eats donuts

Regardless, there will be many sign-up sheets!  Come rush the coolest classes and activities around! We have acting classes, yarn classes, sculpting classes, and of course, Creative Writing!  Come sign up!
*Asterisks not included

J. Christopher Scott
Donut Something or Other

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