These Aren't the Bagels You're Looking For...


Friday, May 4th, 2012

Ah, Friday mornings!  I'm pleased to report that as of this week, it's been a year since the first donut email rattled about in my brain (breaking off a few corners) and poured out of my ear in a jumbled mess onto the computer screen before you!

 I thought it was time to explain where the donut emails come from!  It is not, as many have claimed, done after having recently enjoyed the smoking kernels of ancient Indian herbs while meditating at the bottom of hidden lake.  Honestly I can't hold my breath that long. No, no. Donut emails come from a much more practical place, indeed.  Outer space.
  It is of course, no coincidence that today is May 4th - national Star Wars day.   I suspect some of you may not know why today is national Star Wars day.  Don't worry about that - we'll get around to it at the end!  In any case, in creating donut emails, my ally is the force - and a powerful ally it is.  The force is an energy field created by all living things.  It surrounds us and binds the galaxy together.  Each day, I clear my mind, emptying it of useless clutter, usually while sitting in a swamp, where it's easier to think.  I concentrate on the living things around me and begin to feel the force flowing through me - between you, me, the trees, the rocks -everywhere!  Yes - even between the kitchen... and the bagels.

  I begin to have visions - the past, the future, old friends long gone.  Eventually things become connected inside of my head. Like the great inventors of the past, ideas combine - like sprinkles and ice cream, or the Nike and the air pump. I begin to transcribe these things onto a computer interface, and WHAM-O - a sugar frosted (or poppy seeded) email screams through the intertubes and directly onto your computer screen!

In any case, we've got bagels today!  You'll need to head down faster than a womp rat through Beggar's Canyon today!

Have a great day everyone - and May the Fourth be with you!*

*This is why it's international Star Wars Day.

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